You can let that shit go. With ease. And no longer allow it to plague you with guilt, shame and anxiety!
So – I suggest you watch the not quite 5 minute video up there to learn EXACTLY what it is you can do whenever the hell you want to let go of yucky feelings.
TO help you let go of CRAP that no longer serves you – i.e. feelings of guilt, shame, pain.
To help you appreciate the beauty that is within.
To help you learn to love and appreciate yourself for exactly who you are so that you live the life of your dreams and attract in an amazing and loving partner to share it with!
To help you raise your confidence and self-love levels so that you fall deeply in love with yourself.
To help you break through your excuses and pain and barriers to love so that you finally learn to love yourself and attract in the love of your life to do the same (if you’re single) or drastically improve your current relationship if you’re in one!
Sound good?
Hop over to the group coaching page right this instant sister, and get ready to experience Radical Self Love!
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I used to be quite the lady and change my attitude and persona and words based on who I was talking to.
If I met a woman who owned a health clinic, for example, I would play up my nutrition degree, I would talk about how I didn’t eat gluten, I would invite her to my yoga class, I would even change the cantor of my speech and the words I would use.
WHICH IS KINDA LAME IF YOU THINK ABOUT IT.
HERE’S THE THING.
Yes – we probably shouldn’t talk to our grandma the same way we would talk to our best friend. And if I met the president of the U.S., I wouldn’t say “sup, dawg?”
But there’s something to be said about being unapologetically true to myself and my beliefs and my way of going about in the world.
Prior to my coaching business, I owned a little cafe.
And it pretty much owned my life.
I didn’t have many friends, because I was working 60 to 80 hour weeks, and just didn’t have the time or energy to nurture relationships.
It was a total drag.
AS YOU CAN GUESS, I GOT LONELY.
If I didn’t have my partner, well I’m not really sure how I would have gotten through that period in my life.
All work and no play.
When that phase ended, I decided I needed some serious female connections in my life.
Strong powerful women that were kicking ass in life (and in their careers) and fiercely proud of who they were.
So I started to go to various networking events where I assumed these amazing women hung out! And you know what happened?I started meeting some cool babes!
BUT…AND THERE’S ALWAYS A BUT…
I wasn’t being genuine.
I didn’t act fully like me – which meant being funny and silly, cursing when appropriate and having a drink now and then.
Instead, I acted how I assumed that person would act or expect in a friend.
So all those connections with these powerful women remained superficial.
No deep and powerful connections happened as a result.But then!
AND THANK GODDESS THERE IS A TURNAROUND.
I decided to let loose. (because what the fuck did I have to lose?)
I talked with passion about what it was that interested me.
I had a drink when I felt like it when everyone else was sipping their bubble water.
I cursed whenever the fuck I felt like it (with some discretion…I’m not a complete asshole).
YOU KNOW WHAT HAPPENED?
These powerful women that I was so desperately trying to make friends with…
ALL OF A SUDDEN THEY WANTED TO BE FRIENDS WITH ME!
And you wanna know why?
I WAS FINALLY BEING ME!
PEOPLE AREN’T DUMB. THEY CAN TELL WHEN YOU’RE NOT BEING SINCERE.
So since I wasn’t being genuine, they picked up on it and kept their distance.
Acquaintances, YES. Friends, NO.
And once I let the magic and beauty and uniqueness of ME shine through 100% of the time….
Deep and powerful connections happened!
So where am I going with this?
You have to be 100% unapologetically YOU in order to attract in those that will FULLY appreciate who you are.
If you are putting on aires and trying to be someone else that you think a guy will like….well then sooner or later he’s going to find the ‘real you’ and might not like what he sees.
So the sooner you go about being 100% confident in who you are and allowing that person to be present 100% of the time…
The only people you actually attract to you are the ones that really matter because they LOVE the true you.
And when you attract in a match that SEES you for who you are and LOVES you for who you are, good times and bad, with or without makeup, with a massive zit on your face or just after a massage….
To help you learn to love and appreciate yourself for exactly who you are so that you live the life of your dreams and attract in an amazing and loving partner to share it with!
To help you raise your confidence and self-love levels so that you fall deeply in love with yourself and attract in a man who does the same.
To help you break through your excuses and pain and barriers to love so that you finally learn to love yourself and attract in the love of your life to do the same!
Sound good?
Hop over to the group coaching page right this instant sister, and get ready to experience Radical Self Love!
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Sign up for the mailing list and get content like this sent directly to your inbox! Plus other inspirational bits and love notes from yours truly!
I recently completed a survey of single women who are actively trying to do something to manifest their soulmate.
To call in the one…
Find their other half…
Their ‘media naranja’ as they say in español….
(now that I’m lounging on the beach in Costa Rica, I actually have time to compile the results and make something of them!)
If you’re one of these ladies, do any of these things sound famiilar?
1. Visualize
2. Meditate
3. Go on spiritual dating sites
4. Not looking
5. Looking
6. Vision board
7. Becoming celibate
8. Making a witches brew
9. Praying
10. Praying harder
I will be the first to admit that I’ve tried it all in regards to dating (and no that wasn’t MY list up there.)
And yet nothing really ever worked….
(well up until now because I’ve actually figured out HOW TO manifest an amazing partner that is exactly what I asked for)
Want to know why?
It’s what I lovingly refer to as the WHIPPED CREAM ON GARBAGE syndrome.
Told to me first by my father.
A world renowned hypnotherapist.
“World Renowned? What does that mean?”, you might ask.
Well, quite simply it means people fly in from all across the globe to work with him.
When I was a kid he taught me about beliefs and affirmations.
And he said: Affirmations are crap. They actually don’t do anything because they are whipped cream on garbage.
Well actually he said shit. They are whipped cream on shit.
If you don’t get to the underlying belief system.
If your underlying belief system, your garbage, is that I’m not worthy, I’m not good enough, I suck, no one will ever love me…
You can look in the mirror and affirm yourself to death but you will still not be good enough, not lovely, not loved…
So…
As you can see, the reasons all these things that women are trying are not working is because they are….
WHIPPED CREAM ON SHIT.
It might taste sweet, it might sound sweet, it might LOOK sweet, but it doesn’t actually work.
Whereas the 6 week program I’ve developed, gets to the garbage, it gets down to the nitty gritty, to the sludge, to the toxic waste.
That underlying belief system….that record on repeat, that tells you you’re not good enough, you’re not worthy, you suck, you’ll never be loved….
What ever it is that YOUR record is…
These are horrible. These are toxic. They are sludge. They are garbage. A toxic heap.
And that is the actual reason that you are not worthy of love.
It’s because deep down inside you actually believe it.
Look in the mirror and tell yourself pretty words…
Sit down with your journal and write affirmations till your fingers bleed.
Do your mantras every day…
Because those are only going to work (and they do work by the way) if you clear the trash, the rubbish, the crap that is sitting deep down inside.
You have this beautiful light, this diamond, this jewel on the inside but it’s so tarnished and covered in all these different negative beliefs.
This 6 weeks to love program, what it does, is start to polish that jewel by tearing away those belief systems one by one and replacing them with something new.
Let me reiterate one more time.
Whipped cream = where you want to be.
I am beautiful.
I am lovely
I am worthy.
I am good enough.
I deserve to have the love of my life.
The garage (not true) = a lifetime of negative belief systems that have been handed to you from your parents, from society, from them TV shows you watch.
They all pile up on top of each other.
They build and they build and they build…
We have to clear the trash out.
Make space. Make room.
So when you actually do amazing powerful work – like mediation , mantras, and affirmations, they WORK! Because then your entire field is clear.
You see what I’m saying?
It’s like trying to make a meal in a pan that’s crusted over with last nights dinner. And before that, last weeks’ lunch. And the month before’s breakfast.
All these layers of grime have been stacked on top of each other.
At the time you’re trying to create anything beautiful and lovely….well it’s gonna taste like horrible old shit. It’s gonna taste like rotten food from months ago.
So you’ve got to clear out the pan.
aka – clear out the trash.
And start fresh!
And then – oh my goodness – you will be THE most powerful, sexy, goddess that you know in your heart of hearts to be true.
You know her.
She’s there.
You’ve caught glimpses of her.
But it’s not all the time.
And I want to help you get to the point where she is.
Do you want to attract a love that is deep and pure?
Do you want to FEEL super confident about yourself and what you have to offer a partner?
Are you looking for an amazing and supportive relationship but don’t know how to create it?
I’m going to let you in on a little secret…
Life is all about relationships.
The relationship you have to objects, the weather, food, and to others – and they all reflect the relationship you have with YOURSELF!
This all started when you were a child.
How did your parents and adults treat you?
What words did they use when they scolded you? Do you use the same words when you scold YOURSELF? The same goes for how you praise yourself. Did you use the same words when you are telling yourself ‘Well-done!’ Or perhaps your parents never praised you so you have no idea how to praise yourself.
And that’s okay. Don’t blame your parents. That’s a victim mentality and removing the ability to take control of your life and actions.
I don’t blame parents. They can’t teach you what they themselves did not know. They are simply victims of victims.
It’s said that every major relationship we have is a reflection of the relationship we had with one of our parents.
Let that sink in.
Every major relationship we have…..
Is a reflection….
Of the relationship….
We had with one of our parents.
Can you find truth in that?
Perhaps too much truth that it’s scary?
Relationships are mirrors of ourselves. Always.
What we attract always mirrors qualities we have or beliefs we have about ourselves.
Exercise #1
Look for someone in your life that bothers you. Describe three things about this person you don’t like. Now look deeply inside of you and ask yourself ‘Where am I like that and when do I do the same thing?”
Close your eyes and give yourself time to answer the question. Write down those instances when you’ve been the EXACT SAME WAY of what bothers you about someone else.
Then ask yourself if you’re willing to change.
When you remove patterns, habits and beliefs from your thinking and behavior, they will change or leave your life. It’s as simple as that.
“Be the change you want to see in the world.” – Ghandi
If you have a lover who is cold and seems unloving, look to see if there is a belief within you that came from watching your parents in your childhood that says “Love is cold and undemonstartive.”
If you have a partner who is nagging and non-supportive, again, look to your childhood beliefs. Did you have a parent that was nagging and non-supportive? Are you that way?
There is only one way to change others – change ourselves first.
Change your patterns and your will find that ‘they’ are different too.
How do we attract the love we want?
There’s a quote I love:
“The flower doesn’t dream of the bee. The flower blossoms and the bee comes to it.”
Love comes when we are least expecting it, when we are not looking for it. Hunting for love NEVER brings the right partner. It only creates longing and unhappiness.
Love is never outside ourselves, love is within ourselves.
Exercise #2
Here’s a tool that I use with clients and it works. It’s also something that can be changed or added to on a daily or monthly basis as your desires and qualities change.
Sit down and list the qualities you want in a relationship. How do you want to feel in a relationship? How do you want your partner to act towards you? And what do you want your partner to say to you?
Now – develop those qualities in yourself and you will attract a person who has those qualities.
And that’s it.
You have to BE the love you want to attract.
Be ready for love when it does come.
Prepare the field and be ready for love to grow!
Be loving and you will be lovable.
Comment below – which qualities in yourself are you going to develop now?
Are you looking to attract a lover that is devoted to you?
Are you looking for a deep, strong unwavering connection with your partner?
Are you looking to heal your wounds and put yourself on the path to attracting the type of love you know in your heart you deserve?
Then read on, girlfriend, because I’ve got three helpful practices you can implement today in order to attract JUST THAT TYPE of love and partner into your life!
As time goes on and my connection deepens with my man, I can’t help but reflect on how far I’ve come in the realm of love. My partner cares for me deeply and I feel secure in his love. He cherishes me and our relationship deepens on a daily basis as he showers me with love and appreciation.
Life wasn’t always this way…
My past relationships are sprinkled with heartbreak, tears, sadness, and disappointment.(sound familiar?)
And as painful as it was, I wouldn’t trade those experiences for the world because they taught me ONE very important thing.
This ONE thing has actually been the basis for the creation of my amazing relationship as it is today.
So what is that ONE thing?
It taught me what I DON’T want in a relationship.
It’s important to know what we want in life and in our love life. When we know what we want, we can take the steps towards creating it!
But sometimes it’s not so easy to figure that out…
How many times have you been asked “What do you want?”
to which the answer is usually:
I don’t know.
Everything.
Whatever.
Whatever you want.
You see, it isn’t always crystal clear to know what we want.
But ask a woman what she DOESN’T want, on the hand…
Ahh…..now we’re talking!
So, when you are continuously confronted with painful situations laden with what you DON’T WANT, it’s a great basis for creating the opposite: a life you do want!
All that pain and all that heartbreak gave me a crystal clear vision of what I do not want in my love life.
So I shifted things around and started practicing three things.
I know you’ve heard it before because I like to preach it!
You’ve got to LOVE THYSELF.
Self-love is the KEY to attracting an amazing relationship.
Our lives are simply mirrors of our beliefs of yesterday. Whatever we believe about ourselves or believe we can have is EXACTLY what we end up creating in our lives.
The reason self-love is so important is simple: we attract people who treat us how we treat ourselves.
How many of you have heard about the woman who always attracts in the abuser? And usually the woman is a stereotypical type of gal: meek, timid, doesn’t believe in herself, the victim.
Many of us carry hidden beliefs that we aren’t good enough or worthy enough to be deeply loved. So we attract someone in that gives us just what we believe we deserve. We create relationships that ‘prove’ this to be true. We call-in people and circumstances that make us feel unworthy. And it affirms our belief system and the cycle continues.
*Sigh*
So how do you break that cycle?
The way to end this cycle is exactly what I teach in my coachingintensive. It centers around learning how to value yourself way MORE than you ever have before!
You learn to listen to yourself. You learn what YOUR needs are. You get to know yourself and become super sensitive to your needs. It’s everything that you’ve always wished (and waited) that your ideal partner would do for you.
It’s how your ideal match would care for you.
But the big secret is – you can’t wait until you’ve found the one.
You’ve GOT to start loving yourself today in the EXACT way you want to be loved.
Only then will you attract in the person that will love you the way you deserve to be loved.
2. Make Space for Love
Let’s say you wanted to buy a new couch for your living room.
But your living room is full!
There’s the old couch still in there, for one. There are stacks of books piled next to it. Last night’s dinner is still on the coffee table….
There is no space in your living room for a new couch.
So how do you expect to fit one in there?
Well for one, you’ve got to clean up the mess.
For two, get that old couch out of there!
It’s the exact same for your love life.
Clean up the mess –
Get your emotional state in order. If you’re still pining over a lost love. Let. It. Go. If you have any thoughts of “there’s no good men out there” you need to replace them with “my guy is on his way! There is totally an amazing match for me.”
Physically clean up the mess. Does your house even offer a warming environment to have a lover over? Do you have the physical space in your life for a second person to be there? To share a bed with? To sit on the couch with? To sit in the car with you? Or are you so entrenched in the single life that your passenger seat is another space to collect your stuff and the bedside table on the other side of the bed stores your stacks of books and magazines? Do you still have photos of ex’s hanging on the wall? Look around and make your space available to host your partner.
3. Visualize Love
This one is the best part of the process!
It’s the best for two reasons.
It works!
It’s fun!
I love to write and I love to dream and use my imagination.
We all have the abilities to create whatever it is we want in our heads.
The sky is the limit! This is how progress is created in the world. How many scientists and revolutionaries came up with something simply amazing that changed the course of history because they dared to dream of something that didn’t exist before?
The lightbulb. Electricity. The gas powered car. An airplane. Gravity. The Earth revolving around the sun, for goodness sake.
And you know what these all had in common?
It was something that didn’t exist prior. It was only in that person’s head.
And then it was created!!
So when you visualize love, all you have to do is close your eyes and picture yourself in an average day with your partner.
What do you do?
How do you feel?
What does it feel like to be loved by this person?
Before I was actually in this amazing relationship I am today, I would journal and dream and write down everything I wanted in a relationship.
And then I would close my eyes…
And I would SEE it and I would FEEL it.
I could imagine what it would FEEL like to be with this person even though I didn’t have the awesome relationship yet.
Before I had experienced what it truly felt like to be cherished by a man, I would hold that vision and feeling in my mind at least once a day, and usually more like three or even five times a day! It felt good to go to my ‘never land’ of a place I had never experienced before.
The more I concentrated on the vision and the feeling, the more certain I became in the idea that my love was being attracted to me. The more I felt those feelings of love and worth, the more excited I got about the relationship!
The more excited I become, the closer the relationship came to me until one day, he was standing right in front of me and ordering a beer. (yup, I met my guy while I was a waitress. Goes to show, you never know what life has in store for you!)
By implementing the practices above, I started the process of attracting my devoted partner towards me.
I loved myself.
2. I created space for a partner in my life.
3. And I visualized what life would look like with that person.
I became the embodiment of love. And so love was attracted to me!
And also, please leave a comment below telling us how you’re going to become the embodiment of love. How are you going to implement these practices into your daily life? Have you already been doing them and are they working for you?
When I was younger, I was a bit of an ugly duckling.
At least, that’s what I thought. I didn’t have a huge amount of confidence; I didn’t go on many dates; The popular (aka cute) guys weren’t attracted to me.
Times were rough.
Luckily, I’ve gotten through that phase and have learned a couple of things. And now…men instantly notice me when I walk into a room.
And it’s good attention. It’s not because I’m wearing a low-cut shirt or a super short skirt.
How would you like to learn how to instantly appear more attractive to the opposite sex without going on a diet, getting a haircut, or buying new clothes? How would you like to have men notice YOU instantly when you walk into a room? Do you desire to get asked out on more dates without changing a thing about your personality?
What I’m about to share with you are seven simple, easy and effective ways to appear much more attractive to the opposite sex without spending a dime on your looks and without changing your personality.
So how do you make some simple changes that will have the men turning heads when you walk into the room and notice you as you’re walking down the street?
Read on my friend, and stick with me until number 7 – because it’s my favorite one, it’s the MOST effective (for me) and you’ll never guess what it is!
One – Smile More
This one is the MOST SIMPLE one to implement! And it works! A study in Switzerland examined the relationship between attractiveness and smiling.
The stronger the smile, the more attractive a face looked.
And not only that, a happy facial expression compensated for relative unattractiveness. So, put a beautiful smile on your face, honey, when you walk into the restaurant, or step into a bar, or walk into a new environment where you don’t know anyone and you’ll instantly appear more attractive and approachable.
Two – Confidence
This is a bit trickier to convey if you’re not a naturally confident person. It’s so much easier to be a wall flower. BUT that’s not for you! Here are a couple of tips to convey elevated levels of confidence that will INSTANTLY make you appear sexier. Celebrate the success of others. Don’t beat yourself up for making mistakes.Celebrate your OWN successes (no, it’s not bragging)! And get this –
Studies have shown that people tend to see you as 20% more attractive than how you see yourself!
Isn’t that amazing? Too many women judge themselves too harshly (I can raise my hand and say I’ve been in this boat before. Too many times.) Have confidence in your beauty and trust that most people actually see you as MORE beautiful than you see yourself! Own it, girlfriend.
Three – Do things you enjoy!
Join a hiking group, volunteer for a cause you believe in, train for a marathon, play guitar at an open mic night, you get the idea! You’ll instantly appear more attractive when you’re following your heart and filling your day with activities that you enjoy.
Bonus – the people you meet will be into the same interests as you – score!
Meeting a guy with similar interests will make it much more likely you two will hit it off and create a lasting friendship, if not something more!
Four – Find your personal style.
If you wear stuff you feel good in, you’’ll instantly look and feel more attractive. Go through the closet and get rid of items that no longer serve you and put much more focus into wearing the items that you LOVE. When you’re celebrating the real YOU, the guys you attract to you will appreciate the real you, too.
Five – Play up your favorite features!
Have beautiful blue eyes? Long sexy legs? Shiny brown hair? Whatever it is that you LOVE about you, find a way to make your best features stand out by choosing certain clothes and accessories that accentuate them. For example, if you have really pretty dark eyes, wearing gold hoop earrings might draw more attention to them. Or how you wear your bangs might attract more attention to those beautiful eyes.
It’s been a while since I’ve had bangs, but when I did, I got so many compliments on my eyes! The attention/focus was directed straight to my big blue eyes!
Six – Hang out with women
Another interesting study!
When you hang out with a group of ladies, men will generally see individual group members as being more attractive than they actually are.
Can we say – ladies night!
Seven – My favorite way to appear more attractive might surprise you… red lipstick!
I find that men are super attracted to me when I’m wearing red lipstick. I FEEL like a sexy vixen when I’m in it, and I KNOW that confidence is just oozing out of my pores and men see that and are attracted to it. I’m not saying you have to go out and buy the lipstick yourself, but it works for me. And it’s a really simple thing to do whenever I need a boost and want to feel more attractive.
I’ve also read studies that show that men are more attracted to women who WEAR red.
There are plenty shades of red, if you’re looking to get a couple more looks in your direction, find a shade that works for you!
So here’s what I want you to do right now!
Start putting all 7 of these steps into practice and get ready for more heads to be turning your way and for your confidence levels to soar and to instantly feel more attractive to the opposite sex!
And put your name and email into the box below to get my free resource guide: “Manifest your soulmate in 5 easy steps.”
These five steps are THE bread and butter if you’re looking to call in your soulmate.
Warning – these 5 steps work quickly so don’t be surprised when Mr. Right comes calling…. 🙂
Whipped cream = where you want to be.
This one is the MOST SIMPLE one to implement! And it works! A study in Switzerland examined the relationship between attractiveness and smiling.
Join a hiking group, volunteer for a cause you believe in, train for a marathon, play guitar at an open mic night, you get the idea! You’ll instantly appear more attractive when you’re following your heart and filling your day with activities that you enjoy.
Have beautiful blue eyes? Long sexy legs? Shiny brown hair? Whatever it is that you LOVE about you, find a way to make your best features stand out by choosing certain clothes and accessories that accentuate them. For example, if you have really pretty dark eyes, wearing gold hoop earrings might draw more attention to them. Or how you wear your bangs might attract more attention to those beautiful eyes.
Another interesting study!
I find that men are super attracted to me when I’m wearing red lipstick. I FEEL like a sexy vixen when I’m in it, and I KNOW that confidence is just oozing out of my pores and men see that and are attracted to it. I’m not saying you have to go out and buy the lipstick yourself, but it works for me. And it’s a really simple thing to do whenever I need a boost and want to feel more attractive.